/b/ - Random

Anything posted here are autistic works of fiction, only a fool would take them seriously.

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Anonymous Global volunteer 03/25/2016 (Fri) 22:08:56 [Preview] No. 3255 [Reply]
We Need You
Okay people listen up we are looking for global janitors.

We need:
>Your username on the site.
>The times you're available (please include time zone).
>What will make you a good janitor.

Email your application at triangles@openmailbox.org

EDIT: to update email
Edited last time by odilitime on 09/02/2016 (Fri) 06:48:15.
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Anonymous 12/21/2016 (Wed) 22:12:52 [Preview] No. 10744 del
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Anonymous 02/08/2017 (Wed) 00:25:50 [Preview] No. 11125 del

Anonymous 02/23/2017 (Thu) 03:17:10 [Preview] No. 11339 del
Will fuck

Anonymous 02/24/2017 (Fri) 07:57:42 [Preview] No. 11346 del
You better.

Anonymous 03/09/2017 (Thu) 18:56:10 [Preview] No. 11450 del

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POSTMODERNISM Anonymous 03/18/2017 (Sat) 19:59:44 [Preview] No. 11549 [Reply]
Hey, /b/.

I've got a story to tell you. It is about da time da SYMBAHLEHSM attacked.

>Be me
>18, Living off n33t d0llars with sister and parents
>Sister walks outside to get muh diet coke because I'm too lazy to get up
>Brings in da six packs
>I thank her and she goes to her room silently
>Briefly fantasise about getting down with her
>Lift diet coke to mouth
>Diet coke spills all over muh Hawaiian shirt
>Lick stain
>Mother ignores me as usual
>Father pretends to like me
>His smile is rather strained

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Stream of consciousness Anonymous 03/18/2017 (Sat) 22:37:18 [Preview] No. 11551 del
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Harry Potter lay, dreaming. In his mind there is a hat, suspended. It comes unhinged, travelling beyond the dream. The hat finds a sunlit hill, studded with flowers and children gorging themselves on chocolate. Chewing faces are smeared with brown residue. Perched atop the hill on its brim, the hat is still. It rolls down the hill, skating between the chocolate-stuffed children. It comes to one child, and stops. Without chocolate, the child stares blankly at its neighbors, filled with emptiness. The hat points its empty bottom at the child and sprays a glittering beam of rainbows. They encircle the child's hands, transforming them into chocolate. Tears of joy streak down the child's smile as it begins eating its hands. The hat flies into the sky. The child waves a brown stump.

The hat ascends to a palace of clouds. Within, God, bearded and weeping, sits beside a mountain of tiny angels. One by one, he picks them up and tears off their wings. He then places them into separate baskets. The hat approaches god, and the rainbow is deployed. It encircles God's crotch. A giant chocolate phallus emerges from God's robes. Dropping his broken angel, he breaks off a piece of his candy member and smears it on his lips. With a chocolate-studded smile, he slowly raises his fist and gives the hat a thumbs-up.

The hat travels into space. It finds itself before the sun. It is a tiny dot before the immensity of the cosmic fire. The hat trembles. A tremendous rainbow issues forth, embracing the sun like a wedding vow. The fire cools and deadens. A chocolate tidal wave roars from its poles and meets at the center. On earth, the skies blacken. The flowers turn to dust. Humanity expires silently, like an infant in its crib. The hat drifts through space, dreamless.

Anonymous 03/19/2017 (Sun) 08:05:25 [Preview] No. 11561 del

Anonymous 03/19/2017 (Sun) 08:15:03 [Preview] No. 11562 del
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One day, after the battle with Hideaki Anno, I was jerking off to Eiken so hard that my dick came of and entered the computer screen. Also, Thom Yorke strangled me to death.I chased my dick through the computer screen after giving Thom a thumbs up. After climbing through the silvery membrane, I landed onto a land made entirely of the film Magnifico by Maryo J. De los Reyes and Michiko Yamamoto. I walked across the DVDs and sometimes 2D projections of scenes from the movie. I ended up falling through a hole and found myself in the scene where Magnifico tries to concoct a remedy for the mortician's ailments. I then strangled Magnifico to death and shot his mother. I then beat the ailing mortician to death. I saw my dick whizzing around a corner so I chased it and fell into a black void. After a while, I fell into the We Were Here Tour by Jason Aldean in Evansville, Indiana. The dick crammed itself into Jason's rectal cavity, causing much screeching. I had to follow the dick up there.


Anonymous 03/19/2017 (Sun) 11:13:19 [Preview] No. 11563 del

Anonymous 03/25/2017 (Sat) 06:07:21 [Preview] No. 11579 del
fucking nerds stop writing so much


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Anonymous 02/20/2017 (Mon) 19:37:36 [Preview] No. 11286 [Reply]
Should children be allowed to consent to sex reassignment surgery?
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Anonymous 03/14/2017 (Tue) 20:00:03 [Preview] No. 11481 del
>using volunteer tag while just posting as a normal anon

Fucking shit, kill your self. Pretty much a name fag at that point.

Anonymous 03/14/2017 (Tue) 22:44:20 [Preview] No. 11485 del
Would you believe it if I told you I'm just not very smart?

Anonymous 03/15/2017 (Wed) 01:04:16 [Preview] No. 11487 del
I'd believe it from any name fag.
Imageboards are not reddit.

Anonymous 03/20/2017 (Mon) 14:06:53 [Preview] No. 11566 del
https://youtube.com/watch?v=cffyclpEo2s [Embed]

Anonymous 03/25/2017 (Sat) 06:06:28 [Preview] No. 11578 del
no because tranny hunters want a cute clit

Anonymous 02/13/2017 (Mon) 15:08:58 [Preview] No. 11226 [Reply]
new webm thread?

old thread
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Anonymous 03/22/2017 (Wed) 01:36:22 [Preview] No. 11570 del
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Anonymous 03/23/2017 (Thu) 15:51:01 [Preview] No. 11572 del
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Anonymous 03/23/2017 (Thu) 19:40:44 [Preview] No. 11573 del
Just stunning. I guess all that time hiding in his russian hotel room gave him the privacy to really think that through.

Anonymous 03/24/2017 (Fri) 19:53:16 [Preview] No. 11576 del
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Anonymous 03/25/2017 (Sat) 00:12:37 [Preview] No. 11577 del
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Anonymous 02/10/2017 (Fri) 03:39:51 [Preview] No. 11162 [Reply]
Ask a pedo thread? ask a pedo thread
>inb4 kys
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Anonymous 03/17/2017 (Fri) 09:25:58 [Preview] No. 11530 del
Is there any sort of conflicted feeling in being attracted to such purity but at the same time wanting to desecrate/defile in it? Do you see it otherwise? What are the wholesome attributes to it? Are you able to reconcile that shit with other shit like you sleep good and shit?

Anonymous 03/17/2017 (Fri) 10:09:10 [Preview] No. 11531 del
I would think he gets to love a girl with the same love you would have for a wife and a daughter. That's twice the emotion, it's sublime.

Anonymous 03/17/2017 (Fri) 10:18:36 [Preview] No. 11532 del
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No there isn't. Imagine it all like this inequality
(Taking her innocence)>(Her being innocent)>(Her not being innocent). The wholesome attribute to it I guess you could say is that I can appreciate child's beauty like most adults can't however you wanna interpret that one. As for the last one, I don't let this define my persona in real life, except the fact that I'm an introvert and always give off a creepy vibe, other than that everything seems to be okay.

Anonymous 03/24/2017 (Fri) 04:04:02 [Preview] No. 11574 del
Get far away from America. Trump has moronically tweeted that something has to be done about “missing children grabbed by the perverts” and suggested that a “fast trial” followed by the “death penalty” is the answer.

Anonymous 03/24/2017 (Fri) 17:30:07 [Preview] No. 11575 del
I'm not from US though

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Anonymous 07/03/2016 (Sun) 19:04:13 [Preview] No. 7937 [Reply]
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Anonymous 10/08/2016 (Sat) 01:00:50 [Preview] No. 9516 del
It's a mascot thing, yes. But my vote was for the beard guy.

Anonymous 10/08/2016 (Sat) 01:43:13 [Preview] No. 9517 del
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I can dig it.

Anonymous 12/27/2016 (Tue) 11:22:24 [Preview] No. 10842 del

Anonymous 12/27/2016 (Tue) 21:30:10 [Preview] No. 10845 del
I prefer the crazy ranting prophet mascot in the desert too.

Anonymous 03/22/2017 (Wed) 21:49:14 [Preview] No. 11571 del
Endchan needs more OC.

Anonymous 03/19/2017 (Sun) 22:12:17 [Preview] No. 11565 [Reply]
jofa thread appears

Anonymous 03/20/2017 (Mon) 21:27:15 [Preview] No. 11567 del
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Do mean that you are a fingolian?
You better not be a banned refugee from ylis

Uncle Anonymous 03/13/2017 (Mon) 18:03:43 [Preview] No. 11466 [Reply]

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Anonymous 03/13/2017 (Mon) 18:26:47 [Preview] No. 11469 del
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Anonymous 03/18/2017 (Sat) 07:07:52 [Preview] No. 11541 del

Anonymous 03/19/2017 (Sun) 16:08:26 [Preview] No. 11564 del

HAHAHAHA, guys, look. I have just found out how to use my microscope to post 1000x pics! This is a 1.8mm hole in some metal! AH!

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Donald Trump says Germany owes US 'vast sums of money' for defence Anonymous 03/18/2017 (Sat) 23:00:06 [Preview] No. 11553 [Reply]


>Donald Trump says Germany owes US 'vast sums of money' for defence

I need an Axis bro to hold me.





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Anonymous 03/19/2017 (Sun) 00:02:06 [Preview] No. 11556 del
American dollar has only as much worth as other nations are willing to receive it in laundering operations like NATO. It's a blessing if he redirects it into buying more fucking aircraft carriers instead of creating bloated EU economy with support from corrupt EU leaders for career soldiers to earn for NOT fighting Syria.

Anonymous 03/19/2017 (Sun) 00:09:18 [Preview] No. 11557 del

Nah just build more subs, more and higher anti-nuke tech, and allow Americans to build massive underground homes for themselves (undoing all mineral rights in America of course)

Anonymous 03/19/2017 (Sun) 00:11:02 [Preview] No. 11558 del
OP is kinda right that Jews and Morgantheux (sp?) and Adenaur and Mossad and Mengele Front all did fuck Germany up.

It's okay OP, talk us through your past.

Anonymous 03/19/2017 (Sun) 00:12:35 [Preview] No. 11559 del
Mengele for example still has deep roots and his family is well known and entrenched OP.

They (Mossad) totally protected him. Jews run their own members as dupes sometimes, and when that Jew learn he was used, he shrugs and says "oy vey! such is the ways of our tribe!"

Anonymous 03/19/2017 (Sun) 03:21:24 [Preview] No. 11560 del

Anonymous 03/18/2017 (Sat) 22:51:29 [Preview] No. 11552 [Reply]
Kapayapaan, Kalusugan, at Kasaganaan
Pangarap ng lahat!

Gumawa si Jesus ng mga himala ng nagpakita kung ano ang magiging kalagayan ng buong lupa kapag natupad na ang mga inihula ng propeta.