Catalog of /b/


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We Need You
Okay people listen up we are looking for global janitors.

We need:
>Your username on the site.
>The times you're available (please include time zone).
>What will make you a good janitor.

Email your application at

EDIT: to update email

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 1

Air conditioned clothes

Holy shit Japan shows its genius again, and I want an air-conditioned jacket, as soon as China makes them more affordable than 600 dollars. Imagine being completely immune to the heat or humidity...and someday you could wear a thick and cool black leather motorcycle coat and be totally insulated from the heat. Or dress up in futuristic clothes like master chief to keep your head cool and have some protection from hoodlums too.

You would have thought someone would have started making these things twentiy years ago?!

R: 2 / I: 1 / P: 1

Greentext the worst thing you've ever done.

>16, perpetually aroused and steadily degrading morality
>live in very rural area, lots of woods around my "neighborhood"
>nearest neighbor is over a mile away, so you can't really call it that
>walking home from lake
>almost home, when I see a crumpled black shape lying on the road
>upon closer inspection, it's a recently killed and intact crow
>already had boner, I decide to do the unthinkable
>take roadkill crow into the woods off the road
>take off pants once I'm out of sight of the road
>fuck the dead crow, tear its ass to shreds with my dick
>there's blood everywhere
>pull up my pants, shaking
>leave crow in the woods, cry on the rest of my walk home

The thing was already dead, so it obviously didn't mind. But I'll never be able to live this down.

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anyone got a link for "viborg mappen" translated to "the viborg folder"
its this danish folder full of leaked snapchat nudes and shit

R: 6 / I: 0 / P: 1

Encyclopedia Dramatica

What the fuck has been happening over the past few months? I just visited ED for the first time in months and now it sounds like an alt-right/nazi hack site, did /pol/ seriously shit up ED with their bullshit? "Nigger", "Jew", "White", etc. are on every fucking page now, and those idiots are spreading like the disease they are. It was always about fun and realism, but now it has turned to shit.

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<50 mb
<not being spammed
<true freedom of speech
<no datamining
<not broken
<tons of text formatting
why arent you on the superior chan yet?

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Operation: Christcucks

Hello faggots, I have conceived a new idea to make hardcore Christians paranoid and scared of the world around them. So, it is evident that the majority of people listen to music on a daily basis, and there is some controversy as to what the lyrics are attempting to convey and instill within the listeners, right? Anyways, if we make a website that purposely analyzes popular songs and interprets the lyrics in such a way that it makes it seem like the song is trying to brainwash the listeners into following satan, it would scare all of them, and lulz would ensue. Here is an example:

From a popular song: The Chainsmokers - Paris

>We were staying in Paris
Paris has one of the largest secretive satanist groups or some shit
>To get away from your parents
Your Christian parents are bad and you need to be a rebellious teenager
>And I thought, "Wow
Satan offers powers that could make any human achieve greatness
>If I could take this in a shot right now
Drinking the blood of a virgin to gain power
>I don't think that we could work this out”
Someone making a deal with the devil to achieve fame
>Out on the terrace
The terrace that oversees hell
>I don't know if it's fair but I thought "How
The deal with satan is not fair and is going to end badly
>Could I let you fall by yourself
You are going to get sacrificed so we can live on
>While I'm wasted with someone else”
Too busy in a relationship with a succubus
>If we go down then we go down together
Satanists want to convert as many people as possible to go with them to hell
>They'll say you could do anything
With the power of satan, one can do anything
>They'll say that I was clever
Clever for managing to convert people to satanism
>If we go down then we go down together
Satanists want to convert as many people as possible to go with them to hell
>We'll get away with everything
Satan and his demons can do whatever they want
>Let's show them we are better
>Let's show them we are better
>Let's show them we are better
We need to show all of the god followers that hell and satan are better

Does this have potential?

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EndChan vs 8chan, and what happen?

this is my first time here, welcome a newfriend
i am thinking about migrating from 8chan, since i read something on /8leaks/ , is it true that they are (data)mining us, and they are running sunshine and other tools that logs ip addresses, posts, and so on?
you have more neet software and have moar neet politics.

Please give me all the information i need, thanks.

R: 3 / I: 1 / P: 1

The true form of Big Brother

Big Brother is just another religion, e.g. God is always watching you -> Big Brother is watching you.

The purpose of a religion is to control the way one thinks, exactly like how Big Brother is about stopping all thoughtcrimes.

Science defeats religion as soon as it finds a way to make people live forever.

R: 1 / I: 0 / P: 2

Anyone remember Katherine Marion and her lifeofagreatmommy YouTube channel? She was that freaky rape survivor vegan stripper that was screwing up her son, and much lulz and faps were had about it.

Anyways, after we fucked with her and she went dark for many years, I think her "son" Kaelin has resurfaced. I stumbled across this profile on Fetlife, titled "ATangerineDream" and I think it's him.

He grew up to be a diaper wearing sissy faggot. Who would have guessed? Lol

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 2

Anime's take on the 80's

California must have felt like this in the 80's? [Embed]

Back then no one drove normal cars: everyone drove a convertible, EZ rider motorcycle, or a JEEP/pickup, COCA-COLA product placement everywhere, all young men are stupid muscular blondes, there was widespread belief in UFOs, omniscient government conspiracy theories, and death valley was a popular tourist attraction. And everyone listened to motown.

R: 6 / I: 1 / P: 2

Gas the Boomers. Generation war NOW.

R: 11 / I: 1 / P: 2

sense of dick in your butthole

Why do neurotypicals start an endless stream of insults and then tell you to get a sense of humor if you don't laugh at them? Specifically not actually getting angry, because that has many obvious answers, just not laughing. Here's the elementary:

>1. they're not jokes
>2. they're not situationally clever (ergo, not surprising)
>3. humor is a sense (i.e. not a skill) to find things funny

That's like a step beyond feminist humor where everybody is being told "oh you're so funny" and has inflated ideas of how funny they are, it's directly asking for that confirmation "you should get a sense of humor" = "you should know when to confirm our sense of humor when we say unfunny things". If you can imagine, I've actually laughed uncontrollably at actual jokes and slapstick. That I have a sense for, despite not having a sense of humor. A sixth sense of humor, as it appears to me. Perhaps a faith of humor, idk.

But to be clear, I'm asking honestly, what is their goal? Why is the answer specifically, out of all things, "sense of humor" is the cause of the hangup when you don't sense non-humor as humor. It is exactly counterintuitive, like saying "get a sense of distance" to person suffering vertigo.

You know who has a good sense of humor?
Robin Williams

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Name movies that you love but the critics dogpile.

>Where the Dead go to Die
>Freddy Got Fingered
>Southland Tales
>A Cure for Wellness

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she loves hicks:

send her some hicks. be good at first,then.

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A question for gays

Hey /cuteboys/, would you rather be straight? If I could give you a pill to turn you straight would you take it? The way I see it, you'd have more available partners if your gayness could be fixed. Sure your sexual identity would change, but basing your identity around a sexuality is shallow and stupid.

On the other hand, if you're gay your partners are more likely to accept crossdressing, a liberal mind, or atheism.

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Swinger life

I'm thinking of joining the FetLife community so I can tie up lots of women and play around, with no figurative strings attached. What's the chance of me catching an STD?

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Anyone going to any fun anime conventions? I've got the 4 day pass to Anime Expo. I will definitely go to Comiket someday.

R: 11 / I: 7 / P: 3

Продолжаем вскрывать заговор педофилов на гойтубе.

Продолжаем вскрывать заговор педофилов на гойтубе.

R: 61 / I: 125 / P: 3

new webm thread?

old thread

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>that bootstrap landing page

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Whats the new place?

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Superhero flicks

I got locked out of my house so I saw Wonderwoman to kill time. (The other movie screenings were even worse.) It was okay but not great. Her powers are kind of weak, and if it weren't set in WW1 she'd seem even weaker. I also hated her naivety, the Christian motiffs ("humams are sinful and unworthy, but thanks be to God for caring about us anyway,) and the pro-feminism although thankfully it wasn't as in my face as I expected.

I will never be a fan of American superhero movies though.

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 3

What music is it?

R: 2 / I: 3 / P: 3

Animal transformations and religion

Can anyone think of any myths in the bible that involved physical transformation into animals, or other metamorphosis?

Japanese folk religion is full of animal transformations, with foxes, tanukis, cranes turning into wives, mermaid/nymphs under the sea, and kiyohime the girl who became a water dragon. Greece was the same with women turning into spiders, men into women, women into trees, etc. Polytheistic religions are much more imaginative.

So far for the bible all I can think of is Lot's wife turning into salt, angels that disguised themselves as humans, and a bunch of talking animals (you know, 'cas talking animals are for kids and so is the bible). The shapeshifting motif seems to be entirely absent! Christian fetishes are weeeak.

R: 1 / I: 0 / P: 3

Where to Now?

I am a lost boy from Neverland
Always on the run from Captain Hook
"Run, run, lost boy," they say to me,
"Away from all of reality."

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 3

>beautifully applied a new screen protector
>it's fucking crystal, flawless, dustless perfection
>completely bricks the touchscreen
>remove, reapply
>touchscreen works, it's also a fucking toupé of maggots and salmonella

god fuck shitting damn low concentration electroconductivity

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ITT: Justin Bieber hate
Motherfucker! How I hate Justin Bieber!

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July 4th video party

I'm considering running another synctube event like the one we did for christmas/anniversary last year. Anyone have suggestions for funny and entertaining shit I can add to the playlist? pic related

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Fuck it.

Since 8ch has turned into 4chan, and nothing creative is going on there anymore, and this board is just sitting here with nothing happening, let's see what we can do with it.

ITT: Post the coolest pics you have. I'll start with this pic of Velcro magnified 94x.

R: 11 / I: 2 / P: 4

Shilling my board

>>>/endpol/ is a board where political discussion happens, but the board is lawless. That means no rules.

R: 2 / I: 0 / P: 4

Compound words let Germans say things no one else can

Console me, /b/. I'm feeling a foreboding sense of hitlertseinkeinefehlermache, and I'm beside myself on what to do about it.

R: 51 / I: 42 / P: 4

>spammer who attacked 8/b/ also attacked 8/pol/
>8/pol/ spamming broke the site

R: 1 / I: 1 / P: 4

little gumb men

When I was a small boy I had these little gumb men. It is real they where little men in jars. I found them in my room on my nightstand a man came and gave them to me. They where like real life action figures but flesh like. Only about 9 inches tall.I would take the little men out of the jars and they would squirm in my hand to the point I had to daze them by flicking their heads. I would make them fight each other and I made them eat my shit. I played with them so hard they died after about a week.I killed one of them by stomping on it and it splat. I made the other one eat the splat and it would start to faint because I would scream and hold it in a fisted hand until they passed out. they would squeak they squeaked if you touched them.

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Ha! 8ch/b/ got spamraided last night, by a guy posting 144 threads simultaneously, which he did repeatedly. Dysnomia asked for help cleaning it up and made a bunch of users vols and gave them mod.php access...including the spammer himself. I have no idea what that idiot was thinking, just handing out credentials to anyone.
Anyway, they are all fucked up now, and so I am showing up here to see who else end up here.

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 5


|>| |<|
| O |

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Draw Thread

8chan is down, and I have nothing to do. Post your requests here, and I will do my best to draw them. (I can do lewd, but I can't guarantee quality.) Other drawfags/non-drawfags are free to join in.

R: 4 / I: 2 / P: 5


I have stopped saying "bless you" when someone sneezes. It may seem petty, but I also think it's weird. We don't have a saying for coughs, farts, or any other bodily function. Why single out sneezing?

For a time I would say "excuse me", when I sneezed, but that got awkward sometimes, so I just stopped saying anything.

If I sneeze and someone says "bless you", half of the tube I say nothing though I shoveled say "thanks" just to acknowledge that I heard them say it, but don't really feel I should thank them for blessing me. I don't need them to ward off the viral spirits that cause colds with words.

Wish they would leave me alone. It feels like they expect me to respond to their automatic conditioning.

R: 36 / I: 28 / P: 5

feels thread

This is the end, right? then i will confess something, i still love her, i've gotten a life, job, gf, sex, videogames, friends... but she's still missing, i was hoping that somehow when i had a normal life, the feels would go away, but they didn't, i don't give a fuck about anything right now, i want to hug her, it's horrible, like every nice thought of us being together is followed by a million sharp needles, knowing it won't ever happen, i hate it, i have to hold my tears at my job, at home, and if i ever met her again i will have to pretend that i don't love her anymore because showing any hint of it could get me in trouble, it hurts.

And to thing that i haven't been this much of a FFFFEGET for 4 or 5 years, god, i miss not being in love.

R: 4 / I: 2 / P: 5

lifelong travelers

Has anyone else taken the time to just wander aimlessly around the world like Kino did? Sometimes I want to buy a motorcycle and do something similar, though I feel like I'm getting too old.
This guy biked from Europe to Asia on a bike for 10 years, and is my hero.

R: 138 / I: 174 / P: 5

oathbreaker dump

Here you can find every oathbreakers

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Sup /b/, someone know's the name of this song?

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Being intellectually superior can get lonely. Let's start a dating website and call it


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Patience Johnson nude BBW slut

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Learn Japanese thread

Starting with some old content.

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Arts and crafts

I want to get into crafts so I can impress girls with romantic handmade gifts and get more pussy. Should I learn knitting, plus making, Chines knitting, jewelry making, or maybe Origami?

I just found out about Chinese knotting. If it were Japanese instead of Chinese I would like it more.

R: 1 / I: 0 / P: 6

Legal weapons

Think I can get a tessen (iron fan) and walk around Japan with it? I know there are restrictions on carrying knives there, but if a Yakuza attacked maybe I could deflect the blow and pummel him with ome of these iron rods. The best part is no one would know I was carrying a hunk of dense metal instead of a harmless fan.

R: 3 / I: 1 / P: 6


I once had this dream where I was on the deep web and I ordered this package that was super expensive but allowed me to take drugs on a plane because nobody checks for drugs on first class. Death was there but he didn't do anything. He was hooded but he wasn't a skeleton I think. I took the drugs and not much happened and I vomited.

Another one was where there was this anime dude on a roof top. There was like this black hole explosion he was kinda sucked into and then he became a woman and he said "Timeline" and then was super obsessed with this ring and it was all in this weird montage.

The final one Imma talk about is like I was in school but everything is kinda blue and the lockers are kinda everywhere and it had a super weird structure. Anyway, my English teacher at the time was talking to me and then there was a jump cut and she was half-naked and then me and my friend were walking along a weird (maybe diagonal) corridor and then he teased me about me screwing my teacher being a fetish. Also, there was this chubby Asian girl lying on the floor who wanted doctor pepper. I'm kind of attracted to Asians and fat people.

Does anybody have any ideas as to what these wack dreams mean?

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I don't live near India or plan to move there. Is there any use for Hindi? Good media, easy pussy, cool stuff to see on a vacation? I do find Indians fun to talk to, they're always upbeat and telling jokes.

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what did he mean by this?

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 6

use this info

P4, pierrehorace
Pierre Edward Horace
November 14, 1994
New Jersey
United States
1011 E Jersey Street APT 3B

R: 4 / I: 2 / P: 6

8chan raid tiem

we raid /b/ by posting retarded /pol/ tier comments

>>image of black person with white person
>blacks congregating with whites?

>>nude image of women who looks early 20's
>under 23?
>pedo reported

don't always go over the top. we want lots of subtle comments shitting up every thread
also be sure to post second pic related whenever it's remotely plausible that a comment is reddit tier

R: 2 / I: 0 / P: 6

Are there any good datamining threads I can participate in on here?

R: 3 / I: 0 / P: 6

How would you react if as a bus boy you had someone trying to take the food you were trying to clean up?

R: 5 / I: 2 / P: 7

bad endings

favorite bad endings? I think real life and cave story.

R: 8 / I: 2 / P: 7

8chan /b/ is now banning people like crazy for no reason

I've never really seen /b/ banning people until now (unless they were spamming the shit out of the boards or something) but recently I was given an extremely long ban with an excuse given by the mod similar to how when mods have no reason and just write in something stupid like "spam" to just have an excuse. the quality of 8chan /b/ has been horrible (a vast understatement) for a while now presumably due to shills fishing for info and goons from other places posing as /b/ users but only posting low quality threads until the whole board is worthless.

anyone else who reads this should know that this is the state of that board right now.

R: 5 / I: 0 / P: 7

Korea pays most on porn per capita

Average Korean pays more on porn than anyone else. (As of 2006 it was $527 per person.)

Korean porn:

R: 25 / I: 23 / P: 7

Are you sad to learn that dinosaurs have gay little feathers all over them? Don't be. It just means the dinosaurs you know are actually fucking rad mummy skeleton dinosaurs.

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 7

>locked threads on the overboard front page

okay, now if not earlier it is the time to delete /pol/

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 7


I need help finding the link for "ViolentDesires"

R: 3 / I: 1 / P: 7

Homeschooled for life, ask a girl a question

I know a girl who was homesschooled K-12 by conservative Christians in the countryside, and who then went to a Catholic university, and now teaches literature at a private Christian school. In other words she never got away from the crazies. Her parents did not let them use the internet or watch much TV, or play non-Christian games or read Harry Potter or Pokemon (because of dark symbolism.) Star Wars was fine as long as she only played the good side of the force. Her stay-at-home mom taught her every subject with only a Bachelors in sports/recreation (obtained from a private Christian university), and she taught her evolution to explain species differation is false, God must have put the sun at the center of the universe with an unusually good view through the dust clouds to the edge of the universe, carbon dating isn't proven, global warming is a hoax, and if you can't see air pollution then it doesn't exist. She has only visited two countries, and thinks most asians still live in tents.

This girl holds outdated prejudices, and is socially awkward, but it's understandable when you know her background. She is why I do not support Homeschooling, and think government needs to forcibly remove kids from the child abuse of all-pervasive indoctrination that ignorant fundies want to enforce on their children. She's so wrong that if you want a good moral or scientific compass, just ask her a question and then do your best not to think how she does. (Not that she thinks much.) When I ask her a question she can't answer, she tells me she's right because her information comes from her mom who is really smart and who is a biblical scholar- she's grown woman with the brain of a child who still appeals to her mom as an authority.

What kind of surprised me then is that she is a feminist and believes in expanding trigger warnings and censorship of "hurtful speech." She's not at all physically attractive or charismatic, but she told me she doesn't ever want to be objectified by men.not that she knows how to dress well, but she doesn't want to be has gawked at, and she complains about how much sexual imagery exists in Disney films and avoids watching anything films rated above PG. I can only picture her becoming a frigid bitch and dying a virgin unless she forms a nearly sexless marriage with another weirdo at So if she came to hold these "progressive views" while living in an isolated life in non-stop brainwashing, then those things and feminism are probably wrong.

I'm meeting her again soon. Is there anything you want me to ask her for giggles?

R: 23 / I: 19 / P: 7

this fucking kike binary edition

Rolled 6 = 6 (1d6)

shekel steal
i really need to stop doing this lol

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 7


Who would be a good male that would be easy to cosplay as? Right now I'm leaning towards becoming Okabe and advertising Dr. Pepper. (The guy in the lab coat from this clip):

Trouble is I'm kind of burned out of Steins;Gate because it's old.

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 7

These scumbags treat a pure bread husky dog pinned under a car like a fuckin chick flick movie in cheap ass theater

R: 37 / I: 10 / P: 8

Should children be allowed to consent to sex reassignment surgery?

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It turns out Castor Beans are as toxic as I once thought.I still would not make a habit of eating them.

R: 1 / I: 1 / P: 8

I want love. Love me.

R: 2 / I: 2 / P: 8

I thought I would have more to say.

R: 73 / I: 18 / P: 8

>has existed for 9+ months but even the highest boards never got a PPH more than 5 and completely dead

>new imageboard that respects users' freedom
>Jim's goons try to stop the migration by shitposting "hurr durr it a pedochan"
>100s of anons migrate from pigchan to libre
>/jp/ is the top board, with more than 1000 PPH
>massive PPH even bigger than the top boards of 8chan
>Japanese Community much bigger than the pedos of libre


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dysnomias house if anyone is interested

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How can I fast, cheap and painless die / commit suicide / end living?

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MFW People Are Still On Endchan

Why? What's here for you?

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Are there memes on tor?

Are there memes on tor?

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Death poems of /b/

So apparently there used to be a japanese tradition of writing a short poem as you were dying, which I find makes me feel almost unbearably...something. Anyway I was wondering if anyone would like to try their hand at it (as if you knew you were dying soon)? Here's a famous one as example

Falling ill on a journey
my dreams go wandering
over withered fields

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 9

banned from cuckchan

We all know most of the anons here were banned from cuckchan, greentext what you did.
>finds CP on google
>asks 4chans /b of opinions if it is cp
>doesn't provide source just how to find
>great discussion
>banned for posting CP

R: 92 / I: 45 / P: 9

Ask a pedo thread? ask a pedo thread
>inb4 kys

R: 15 / I: 9 / P: 9

fuck me. 8ch is even more unbearable of late.

R: 4 / I: 1 / P: 9


Has anyone seen a ton of these things in real life? There was a visual novel where a girl went to a river swung a magical sword that caused a breeze, and kicked up about ten thousand of them. I think the pictures I've seen are fake.

R: 2 / I: 1 / P: 9

My sad story: when I was Gang raped in the park

So Tte other day I wa physically sexually harassed. I was playing on my guitar in a park and two darkie kids who were manspreading a distance behind me who had no appreciation for fine music started throwing nuts at the table around me when I wasn't facing them as a prank. Then one of the nuts collided with my back and I realized it was just a symbol of male dominance and I was looking at black rapists. And do you know how scary it is to be alone with real coloured rapists?

It was a real triggering for me. I had just been quasi-mentally sexually gang-raped. Never before as a cishet have I felt the shame of being threatened and victimized with violence by the androcratic order of budding rapers. I had never b4 been forced to touch another man's nuts in all my years of practicing "G-D Knows" with falsetto voice (for authenticity only as I am not gay.) But now I know firsthand the struggles of the womyn and transbians. My world had shifted. As I walked out of the park nothing happened at all, but I will never forget what happened on that day.

R: 5 / I: 4 / P: 9

"I am a survivor"

What the fuck do people mean when they say this? Everyone you have ever met by definition is a survivor, otherwise they would be dead. How is this anything to brag about and not just a hollow platitude?

R: 5 / I: 0 / P: 9

banned from 4chan for saying pizza any help?

R: 2 / I: 1 / P: 9

New Cracky/SkyQueen bread

>old one kill
>no nu1

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 9

Recipe sharing

Popping boba, goes well with ice cream.

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 10

Dear God,

It's me anon. I know you put the demiurge in a provisional role for the last few thousand years or whatever but if you could find it within your capability, and all seeing glory to make this not happen through any means by which you see fit I would be even further in your debt than I already am. Thank you.

R: 5 / I: 2 / P: 10

So wtf happened to the one episode of family guy where peter or brain went on a magic carpet ride with the genie from Aladdin and had a song about Islam's main goal to take over the west. I remember watching it is a kid wonder "huh is that really what Islam is really about?" only to remember it now when seeing all the the shitskins in Europe. I even remember seeing it in those old Hulu clips they had on youtube to promote Hulu. But now for the life of me I cannot find it, not on youtube, not on google, reddit, family guy wika, netflix virtually nothing. Some one out there has to have those dvd boxes with the original episode. This would be such a good way to redpill normies, pls /b/ halp

R: 1 / I: 0 / P: 10

Webm Thread

Lets go boysss

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 10

the astonishing origin story

oh boy i sure am eating mac tonight

R: 0 / I: 0 / P: 10

Duel of Songs


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Good tv shows

Do we still have some good educational shows on TV?

And Boomer friend is a fan of master chef Jr on local TV. Another dumb reality tv show. She loves them, watches several hours of them every night, watches Fox too, listens to conservative tall radio and voted for Trump. This is an example of capitalism making people stupid.

R: 44 / I: 10 / P: 10

Nearly all of my immediate fam and "friends" are fucking satanist I've been an on and off neet since I graduated should I just joint the military to get away or bum it in another state?

R: 11 / I: 2 / P: 10

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Most offensive

Bring it on, let's see y'alls most offensive or disturbing memes. No holding back.

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k i l l a l l a n g l o s



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I shat in a sock and froze it and then I shat into a second sock and took both poopsocks with one in each hand and swung the warm poopsock into a busker's face then immediately followed with the frozen one so that the last thing he remembered before losing conciousness was getting hot karled. I name this technique "Summer and Winter Strike". I then proceeded to place my weapons over each of his hands and secured them with cable ties like some scatological bondage mittens. When he awoke he was shocked! A crowd had gathered around us too. But I merely gave the busker a knowing look, and at once he understood. His destiny was not to sing for pocket change. He was to be the next boxing world champion. I took his bound and shit-covered hand in my own and from that day on, his training began.

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I'm 19 and still virgin.
Need help with the girls. I don't know what to say to them and that shit.

Post flirting tips and overall seduction tips I suppose

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Okay, so. Apparently the season 3 of Rick and Morty preview referenced this McD's Disney Mulan sweet sauce, leading to a bunch of people asking for it to return, which in turn butt hart a bunch of SJW's calling it racist because just like hollandaise isn't Dutch and there's no pineapple in italian oven bread, szechuan is nothing like Chinese Sichuan.

This is all quite retarded. Only one thing left for McDonalds to do: re-release szechuan under marketing term like #TriedSzechuan, and troll everybody by making it taste like shit instead of good. Make it canon that Rick did it, I don't know.

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Armageddon Alternate Ending

Alternate Ending to the movie Armageddon (funny meme video teeheee lol :-}) [Embed]

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Krosmaga porn thread

>play Krosmaga
>interest grows
>go to rule34 paheal
>search game title
>mfw only 2 copies of Cra jerking dick

Guys, this is sad.
Not even a single fucking Sacrier painal gif.
Not even a single Cra mutilating dicks.
I wish I didn't give my wacom to artistically more talented and engaged imouto-tan. T_T
Anyway, we need more porn of that. NOW. SERIOUSLY. Like, IOS r63, ANYTHING at this point. Even faggotry. ANYTHING.

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>"there are no girls on the internet"
>literally everything from gamergate to youtube monetization is thin-skinned Mean Girl Syndrome drama bullshit from all sides

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Urgent warning about space rays

Tonight at 12:30am to 3:30am make sure to turn off the phone, cellular, tablet, ect...and put away from your body. Singapore television announced the news. Please tell your family and friends. Toinght,12:30am to 3:30am for our planet will be very high radiation. Cosmic rays will pass close to earth. So please turn off your cell phone. Do not leave your device close to your body, it can cause you terrible damage. Check Google and NASA BBC news. Send this message to all the people who matter to you.

Please share this status so that you'll be saving millions of lives

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8chan down again

I wonder how long it will take to restart this time?
Also, did this have anything to do with the /b/ get?

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Call this number and wish him a happy birthday 619-2147-492

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Bath Nite

can you wash your penises too hard?

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The wonders of foreign food
>pee is collected from primary schools and usedan to soak flavor into a hardboiled egg.

>Stinky tofu tastes like rotten garbage.

>Chinese refuse to eat Mexican food because it's dirty, and non-Asian food abroad because it doesn't taste as good as Chow Mein in Paris.

>But their tastes aren't worse, don't be prejudiced.

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Anyone else hear that Hans Rosling died?

I always liked his Don't Panic stuff. There is a great part where he shows how the whole world is progressing, except Africa. [Embed]

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Can you attach flacs?

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I have tried to understand why this woman passes me off, but now I think I have it. It's not because I wasted money on a thick gender studies book without substance that I won't read. It's not because she's fugly either, or writes like a SJW with autism, as she transbitches about gender entitlement while insisting the rest of the world use words she made up yesterday. No, those are surface irritants, but there's a deeper hypocrisy.

It's because she quit calling herself an atheist and identifies as "trans-agnostic." And she has a PHD in Biochemistry and Molecular Biophysics.

Her reasoning is weak.
>It's fine to offend cisscum
>but I gots to draw a line on religion. See, just because I haven't had the experiences of Christcucks that doesn't mean they'really wrong.
>if my trans feelings have validating power others can'to see, then so might their religious feelings have proved to them what I haven't seen
>the real problem in the world is "arrogant people."

Fuck you for wasting my time and money. She is not writing as a scientist, do not read her books. You are the perfect example of why I would have to be crazy to take hormones. You wrote that Testosterone numbed your emotions, but I see losing it has weakened your rationality. You decided gratification from your sexual identity mattered more, and then you sold your gifted brain for a hormones fix. That poor brain doesn't deserve the pollution you fed it, but I will accept "trans-agnostic" for the new trans-religion you're a member of.

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New Imageboard Concept in Early Planning Stages

PROMISEDCHAN (name liable to future change)
There is a new imageboard-software concept in the works. Addressing the problem of powerful moderating positions being compromised and shitting up the board against the will of board communities and their established board culture.
(See: 8/b/, 8/pol/, etc.)
>Nothing that isn't spam or illegal is deleted, ever. You can subscribe to different moderation teams (and bots) to have the shit filtered to your liking. There would be a default moderation team for each board but the default would change if the majority changed the moderators they subscribed to.
>To keep normies from freaking the fuck out a default profile of moderation subscriptions will be applied by default, the default moderation will be decided by an impartial algorithm that takes in to account the modoration most users in a board choose, weighting the chooses by activity.

Unfortunately there is a shortage of skilled /tech/anons who are willing to assist in the planning and development of this new imageboard concept, which is holding back development.

If you're interested in assisting in the development of this new imageboard concept, please go to
If the link is broken, try checking the catalog on

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The end

It would be cool if the world suddenly ended according to a prophesy. Life is boring, I want to see beautiful chaos before I go.

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How do I know for sure that my sister wants to fuck me?

I've been wanting to fuck her for awhile and I'm almost 100% sure she wants the same but not completely sure. I might be taking normal things as signs that she wants to fuck me and I could be misunderstanding. I'll give examples of stuff she's done

One time I was in my room studying Latin (yes, Latin) while my parents were gone and she asked me if I wanted to come into the kitchen to do my Latin, and she was wearing a bit more of a revealing shirt than she usually does which really outlined her tits. Not realizing what she couldve been doing, I said no because I wanted to play Halo and when I said no she sounded really disappointed .

She has made multiple possible sexual references when she talked to me but were very subtle such as when I say "I'm hungry" and for seemingly no reason she says something like "Really now?"

The other day while my parents were gone I was in the living room waiting while suddenly for no reason at all she just stops studying to watch a mechanical little Christmas play we have on our buffet which she never watches. She rested her head and her really nice ass was pointed out and she was moving kinda lewdly. Not sure what to do I kept eating (Btw, she never, ever randomly stops studying and when she does she never just watches random stuff). Suddenly my parents came home and once she heard the door and stood up straight as if she was only watching the play.

I posted about part of this on 8chin a few months ago but like a cuck I did nothing. If I am 100000% sure she wants to fuck me I will act on it and I could possibly be having "hot incestious sex tonight" and many other nights ahead of me. What do you guys think?

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==HAPPY NEW YEAR== [Embed]

Happy new year /b/ee I'ma get high as fuck cause it IS 4/20 EST right now. What're ya'll doin for the Stoner New Year?

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>8chan is borked again just barely a week after the previous snafu.

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something you cant find on the net

lets see if others can find shit that shouldn't exist
for one i have never been able to find gay midget fisting porn. Not the type where the midget is fisting but one with a regular guy with a midget on each hand, like a punch and judy show

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Social experiment

Okay, here is how it's going to be;

You're going to ask question to a fake person (but act like it's a real one) , and we're going to see how long it take for someone to say "tits or gtfo" or "send nudes" (or anything related)

Here is what you know from the beginning ;
She's a shortstack with gigantomastia, so now, let the experiment begin!

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hey can you source me the full size image of this crosshatch of Trump from a trump hate channel, shit's looking rad AF

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ian miller antifa friendo list

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Truth about Jesus

Philosopher Frederick Nietzsche talked about it a lot, and I'm attracted to his right-wing ideas, and extreme thoughts. He was one of the first to realize that philosophy will never catch on among the lower classes, and they will always want a religion as a crutch. He realized that if we cannot remove religion for the lower classes, we need to at least create a new modern philosophy that has mystical religious elements and which will make people truly happy and alive if they practice it within this life, while not burdening the real philosophers-- this "life-fullness" is something which Christianity absolutely doesn't do with its focus on eternal servitude and eternal guilt from sin. Christianity was popular with the poor because it gave a justification for the slave classes who had to endure daily injustice from their masters; religions that began with the rich such as Scientology, or the middle classes (wicca) usually have an entirely different character, and Christian churches have different characters depending upon the demographics; wealth and prosperity gospels and social darwinism are more practiced at the affluent churches and the rich are more apt to treat church as a social and networking club and go while not actually believing in God.

The whole history of religion is of conspiracies. I put the most stock in the idea that Jesus [] was a mentally abused child, which I'll paraphrase. Now his mother got knocked up before she married Joseph, and she would have been stoned to death, so she came up with the idea that God had impregnated her. (Although it wouldn't be credible today, back then she managed to get superstitious people to believe her, or at least to fear God enough to not challenge her too much.) Now she had to keep repeating this to everyone for Jesus's entire life otherwise she would have been stoned to death, and since Jesus was raised in that environment he came to believe it, and it fed his ego in adolescence when he became a cheeky brat who would speak back to his parents at age 12 at the Synagogues. His confidence attracted a following, but the lies his parents fed him set the stage for his tragic death.

His ego went to his head and as the son of God he felt justified to chased men in the temple with a chain, and perhaps had a history more violent and threatening than the bible lets on. The Romans came, saw him as a troublemaker in occupied territory, and killed him.

After his death his followers went through a stage of grieving and at least one of them probably hallucinated about seeing a ghost, and perhaps caused a group hallucination. A series of psychological events as they tried to rationalize his death within the existing theology led to him being turned into a blameless martyr; the story was rewritten countless times and changed to suit the changing theologies. (The earliest of the 4 gospels was written about 50 years after his death, and that alone means we should take it with a huge degree of skepticism. In addition, the 4 gospels constantly contradict each other - Jesus's last words, where he went after he died, did Mary and the girls see him first and tell the disciples, or did an angel tell them where to go, or did Jesus just walk into their midst while they were fishing and and surprise them, etc. ) Every change, and every addition to the bible was made for the purposes of the person writing it, with contradictory passages being scrapped and whole books being burned by certain parties.

For example, the movement was originally popular with women because it was empowering and new-- anyone could say the holy spirit was talking to them, and so women demanded respect. This made the men uncomfortable and eventually at least one of them inserted a few lines into one of the letters attributed to Paul so that the women would shut up and stop contradicting the existing culture.

"A woman must learn in quietness and full submissiveness. 12I do not permit a woman to teach or exercise authority over a man; she is to remain quiet,"
1 Timothy 2:11-12

We have prove

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>take a waifu
>make her a burly man
Classic inversions don't ever get dank

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>take a waifu
>make her a burly man
Classic inversions don't ever get dank

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Bad places to live

Southern California sucks.

Los Angeles county: Traffic, punishing heat most of the year, no seasons, no festivals, uneventful days. Cracks in the sidewalks, graffiti, gum stains everywhere, except when the bums sit on these blemishes. Cheap functional architecture makes for ghetto scenery. Widening rift between the rich and poor means the best looking buildings are McMansions on cliffs by the coast, while downtown, city hall, and the public libraries look like temporary structures built in the fifties. Pathetic mass transportation due to the car industry lobbying to remove the railroads and cable cars in the west.

Bilingual means Spanish takes up the signs, and Mexicans give worse service at restaurants unless you're a Mexican. Poor customer service, and retarded baby-talk languages like Chinese, Korean or Vietnamese when you're curious enough to eavesdrop.

Crumbling public infrastructure and public educational facilities. Occassional smog, sometimes from wildfires. Constant police helicopters, flying colors, violence and policy failure in the local news. Shallow materialist types, especially whites and UCLA asians. Their favorite news is entertainment, which deals with the personal lives and careers of Hollywood celebrities on par with insignificant high school clique gossip.
No nature, nowhere to be alone or breathe fresh air unless you own a car and drive for hours. Unfriendly people, but they don't put on the fake smiles and polite greetings like in Orange County. Bad parks. Literally nowhere to go, and nothing to do in the suburbs except waste money shopping, or on coffee or boba milk tea.

Orange county: stuck up white people and most of the other problems. Fewer gangs than LA County, but more blatant bullying at schools. Every other neighbor is part of a Evangelical Christian club of hypocrites riding on high horses and Armageddonists. And it gets worse: Persians (Muslims) are moving in. Fake people who smile and say hi when a stranger passes or walks into a building, but are unfriendly and uninterested in conversations. Bigger parks, but still boring and a weak sense of community. Every kid under 22 is a gamer/quasi-loner or on drugs.

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Suspicious of GF

Need to find info on friend's GF who we suspect is hiding and lying about numerous things. Here is some of her info:

Brittany Christine Lanier
home: 770-479-7235
428 Upper Bethany Rd, Ball Ground, GA, 30107
454 Pittman Ln, Canton, GA, 30114,,,2015-08-17 00:00:00,Brittany,Lanier,70 Mansell Ct,,Roswell,GA,30076-1523,,,,

Glenda Lanier
Benjamin Lanier
Douglas Lanier
Alesha Parsons
Amber Lanier

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Oldfag nostalgia

Let's get an oldfag nostalgia thread for people lurking on 4chan and other sites back in the early 2000's

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Sup /b/itches

I heard you pussies dream of a day you could watch nostalgic 90's spooky horrow shows with your fellow anons.

Shit like are you afraid of the dark and goosebumps and spooky anime bullshit.

Todays that day. Get on it.


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/b/, ever since I was about 12 or 13 years old, I have masturbated to BDSM on both ends, incest, public, trap/shemale rape(real rape, not fake pornhub stuff), peeing, beastiality and gangbang porn. In hentai, I masturbate to beastiality, monsterxhuman, futa, incest, guro, dolphinxhuman, robot, loli, shota and some more that I probably forget. I have masturbated to pics of my eldest sister, fantasies of my eldest sister and have dressed up in my youngest sister and mothers clothes/dirty underwear. Sometimes I even tie my balls from my body, tie my actual balls apart so they swell up, force myself into a few sizes too small jeans, then zipper them up and force myself to watch porn for hours on end without touching my dick, not even to scratch an itch. I would go a bit more into detail, but I have a feeling that the party van might be watching me.

How do I stop? Also, what are your guys fetishes?

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Is it allowable to post pornographic images of pornography on this random world wide web information superhighway?

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Times Herald-Record editors' fake news lecture, contradicts own claim

>lecture/Q&A panel on fake news at a college
>editor asked about wikileaks and pizzagate
>called out in email for contradictory claims
>paranoid dismissal reply, spouts propaganda, then goes silent when questioned further
Just another example of journalism at it's finest

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Anyone know where I can get The Seduction of Anita Sarkeesian is pdf?

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Where have you been when 8gag was haxored?

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Shitposting discord

Help a bro out by joining (you can leave if it's not your thing)

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what were we unable to discuss or discover while 8chan is "down" from "hacking"? what event or events took place on 8chan, and in the rest of the world as a whole, or in a specific place in the world that we were unable to discover or discuss since 8chan is down?
are you feeling that feeling?

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Donald Trump says Germany owes US 'vast sums of money' for defence

>Donald Trump says Germany owes US 'vast sums of money' for defence

I need an Axis bro to hold me.






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Potter Fakes

Interested? Have more.

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webm thread?

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/mlpol/ is a board of peace.

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Don't objectify me

>"I feel oppressed by the wage gap."
>"I wish men would stop objectifying me-I mean turning us into sexual objects."
>I comply by facing her and scrutinizing her carefully
>I notice she has acne, no fashion sense, no breasts, no curves, no ass, but she has glasses, ugly brown hair, and a weird,
judgement brainwashed personality due to a life of homeschooling.
>think she's an incredibly ugly object I couldn't possibly sexualize
>think she's such a boring and frigid bitch that she couldn't get laid if she tried
>not even if she stripped, did a pole dance, and and flung herself into the arms of a drunk rapist who hadn't beat off for a month
>feel pity for the forever chaste Catholic feminist who was the first to talk about sex.

Feminism is a defense mechanism that helps ugly women to feel good about not getting hit on by men.

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The Babysitter (2003)

Is this not the greatest film ever made?

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Should I continue pill popping?

>bought 10 md pills yesterday
>No marking on them and shaped in hexagon shape
>1 pill later before the bus ride I get so comfy euphoria on just 1
>stronger then anything I've tried when it comes to pills
>been awake since 8 am yesterday
Should I pop some more pills or what? Like I had a mixed weak vodka drink before but I don't feel to I'll or anything just like really dry in the mouth

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Why Did Cuckchan Turn To Shit?

Was on 4cuck cause I'm on vacation and figured I would Shitpost on /b/ (I'm permanent banned from there at home)

Fucking faggot bans me for making a loli thread

Where did they go so wrong? That place used to be better and now it's not. It's pretty sad. We have 8chan but too bad it's hacked

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>the best imageboard with a functioning overboard
>nothing but /muh community from that other shitter chan/ on the front page

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Have you taken the brown pill yet, mateys?

it's a tough pill to swallow! The brown pill was founded in 1999 by Sir Reginald Brownpill, who presents and narrates the attached video.

Forget red and blue pills, brown pills are the way of the future.

Video related. Please leave your questions, comments, and concerns below about this radical new paradigm of thinking!

Swallow the brown pill today! Red pills are for fedora fucking wearing faggots, blue pills are for the ignorant masses. Ignore the other le epin /pol/ maymays, this one is the readl deal.

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Non-Tobacco Pipe-Smoking

So I have always had a fascination with pipe-smoking. I've always associated them with maturity, sophistication, and better times. But lately I have been doing some research into pipe smoking, and I found out some interesting things that I did not know about.

So apparently pipe-smoking entails merely tasting the smoke in your mouth and not breathing it in, and so thus, pipe blends are accordingly flavored to be more flavorful. You let the smoke flow into your mouth, taste it, then blow it out.

Since the smoke isn't usually inhaled, pipe-smokers have substantially lower rates of lung-cancer than your standard cigarette smokers.

However, they are still at high risk for getting different cancers that develop in the mouth because of the carcinogens in tobacco.

I had done similar research in the past on "herbal cigarettes" which are basically just tobacco-free cigarettes that are mainly used by actors in films who do not want to smoke tobacco. Thing is, you are still at risk for lung cancer when smoking herbal cigarettes because of the smoke. Inhaling smoke of any kind exposes your lungs to different tars, carcinogens, and toxic gases. Even incenses poses this same risk to the consumer.

But then I found out that you can "smoke" basically anything in a pipe as long as it's been properly prepared for smoking. The only risks involved are the effects of the specific substances/plants that you are 'smoking' which each have their own effect on the human body, for better or for worse. Also possible incidental inhaling of the smoke could be bad, but it's not like you are breathing in that much more smoke than you do on a daily basis with car exhaust, propane stoves, campfires, burnt popcorn, etc. But there doesn't appear to be any risk in tasting smoke on it's own in your mouth, it's no more dangerous than when you eat SMOKED meat (which has been smoked in a smokehouse,).

So I think sometime in the very near future I just might try herbal pipe-smoking. Evidently most herbal teas have been prepared in such a way that you can smoke the contents of any herbal tea- be it mint, raspberry, or even just Black Tea. When I get to it I'll make sure to give you guys an update.