>tfw fell into drinking at 14 >weed at 15 >pills 16 >coke and any other drugs i could get my hand on at 17 >meth at 19 >finally got clean at 20 >still live with mom >23 now >spend every day counting the hours until friday night so i can get drunk alone >mom knows this is all that makes me happy >she's terrified >accepted the futility of everything myself
10 years ago. 10 years ago I left the Marine Corps after two very boring tours in Iraq. I left the Marine Corps for a woman. This was the woman I loved. The woman I spent my entire life fighting and surviving shit just to see again. I got home. It was amazing. I left the Marine Corps behind -- the only career I'd known -- and I pursued her into the hills of Appalachia. We made love in a small duplex nestled on the foothills of some mountain outside of our college. I was going to be a psychologist and tell all the other veterans how to feel after they left the war. Because I knew how to feel. I knew the feels, right? We had two amazing years together. Two of the best years of my life. And then they fell apart. We never wanted to get married because marriage was for quitters. 2006, amirite? Who wants to get married when everyone is expressing themselves? We have a free love revolution ahead of us! We ran out of steam in 2008. I met a 3.14qt weeaboo in college who was 4 years younger than me and was totally down to commit to a life of servitude. Fucked my world up. What the fuck do I do with a woman who wants to commit to children and a future when I've committed to a woman who wants to "see it through to the end" in name only?
>>159 >pretending you have enough experience with 3d women to give advice
Lets face it, although a "free love" disease spreading degenerate, OP had sex. Now he can imagine that feeling while he masturbates to anime. We should be telling OP to move into his parents basement and live the dream!
"Free Love" usually means you're chasing real love in all of the wrong ways, using sex as an opiate to medicate a real problem until like all drugs, one develops a resistance. Those guys who base their self worth on how many women they've slept with, they never had any real self worth or confidence to begin with. Inevitably, they find themselves in the only bed that can scratch that itch; in the bed of horror herself.
Now some men make a lover out of horror. Memories are funny things; remember something too much, and it fades, remember it too little, it only becomes accessible in a similar moment. Some things in your life, you will never remember again, and some things haunt you. Most women fill you with good memories, subjugate the harm of the bad ones, they take away your venom, forcing you to develop interdependance with others. Horror though, she takes away fear; She removes the need to self-preserve, their need to have an identity, a sense of self, or to retain any notion of who and what one is or once was. All memories become lifeless, people do not matter to you. She focuses a mans passions on unobtainable abstracts; power, wealth, fame. Afterall, how can someone be content without fear, without risk or a sense of the possibility value might be lost or gained? Horror demands her entertainment.
This is total liberation; a state of being truely free.
Most men horror doesn't favor or truely love, so she offers them mercy; a gun for a lover and a shot for the pain at hand.
Let someone, whom horror loves intensely, give you some advice.
You can commit suicide any way you'd like. Pull the trigger and end your suffering, that's one way. Go work a soulless job making money for some 3rd generation company owners little shit. That's another way. Go into a bad neighborhood and raid crackhouses for money, then take monthly trips to vegas. Or, give your life away to Uncle Sam.
Or, Go find the Weeaboo and offer her a ring. That's another option.
Ultimately, all you are doing is trading your life for something. Make it a good trade. You only get one.
>>234 Another huge problem is that I am largely in denial about this and refuse to think about my personal experience and try to just destroy what I know is the reason this is allowed. As long as I am destroying the ability for these people to continue to do this unchallenged then I do not have to force myself to come up with how and why this happened to me. I do not think it is a family thing I am not a bloodline or anything but freemasonry has got to go. Because If I can not even bring myself to admit what these people have done to me imagine what they are doing in every single fucking town on the planet.
>tfw everyone uses proprietary, centralized and non free social media to keep in touch >tfw they use these services even though there's hard evidence of deliberate spying and exploitation of their users
>tfw everyone everywhere has an android/ios based smartphone >I don't have one for reasons stated above >tfw only way of communicating with others is by phone >tfw phone works by constantly sending/receiving requests to nearby towers revealing your location at any given moment >tfw no one uses it anyway
>tfw hardly anyone uses anonymizing networks >tfw no people to start a local WAN/MAN with since no one seems to be interested (and let's face it, it will end up deader than onionland in the long run) >tfw IoT will be run on global internet infrastructure, not MANs or at least state run networks
You can be ruined by performing in pornography. You suck off a jew dick in a casting couch that will be available in at least 720p indefinatley. I never expect to have a woman suck my dick to completion though if that is the concern. The thing about the porn is that it is an escape. Compulsively fapping is an escape like drugs. I understand there is a dehumanization to the whole porn thing but it does not have to do with lonleyness I see sex an masturbating to porn as 2 different experiences. The sex is something that accompanies a warmth that porn destroys. Porn is like a way to get out the viral instinctual urge to go and court a woman. I understand that part of it if that is why you think men are ruined. I would argue it is a chance to not fall into petty relationships.
But I can stop watching porn I can not stop fapping. You have to fap sometimes when you wake up.the sexual frustration is palpable. I remember waking up and fapping to completion before my eyes where fully open. Its not the fapping that the problem is rather the sex cult that runs porn and the prostitution and strip clubs or (((gentelmens clubs))).that is the same sex cult that farms children and shit. these people make porn because there is interest for seeing cult women in sex. Some of the popular celebrity porn stars are actually women who calm down children that are being tortured in satanic rituals. THey tell them everything is fine so that they can be murdered and totally drained of all the life force when they where calmed down. Ok so all of this semen worship and whatnot is the same kikes fucking over the masses. Porn makes it seem like men who like to see grown women having sex as a bad thing. There is a shameful bad side of porn and not even tranny and gay porn fuck it if you are a fag homo out. But there is horrible things done with impunity because of the cult that is a sex cult that has ruined the world. The more exotic and taboo the better to them. That is a dangerous way to think and that is why there is these festering people who get off on seeing little kids cut up and stuff. There is bad porn. There is bondage and child and bestiality and hurt-core and illegal porn.Then there is sexual snuff like Daisy's destruction. People have been fooled into thinking bondage is a legitimate subculture only to show up at the super sekrit sex party to be stabbed to death while hog tied. It happens all of the time. That is dangerous porn because everyone associated with it in any way is constantly seething over hurting people and luring people into the pain cult. So even if someone like facial abuse videos they are watching women act in sex of their own free will. It is a lust kind of sin. But porn is not ruining men. Cults are ruining men. Cults are killing people and saying the people they killed committed suicide. Cults do false flags to create a police state to execute everyone publicly. If the jews saturate the internet with so much porn that half of the web is porn than that is just kikes kiking out.
The man and the woman make love; attain climax; fall separate. Then she whispers, “I’ll tell you who I was thinking of if you’ll tell me who you were thinking of.”
One man’s meat, as they say, is another man’s poison, a fact now recognized by the American judiciary, which must rule with wearisome frequency on obscenity. With unexpected good sense, a judge recently observed that since the books currently before him all involved ladies in black leather with whips, they could not be said to corrupt the generality, since a taste for being beaten is hardly common and those who are aroused by such fantasies are already “corrupted” and therefore exempt from laws designed to protect the young and usual. By their nature, pornographies cannot be said to proselytize, since they are written for the already hooked. The worst that can be said of pornography is that it leads not to “antisocial” sexual acts but to the reading of more pornography. As for corruption, the only immediate victim is English prose.
I don't watch anime, and I don't play games. I spent my teenage years trying to get a job, but never landed one. The school preached far and low that if we went to College/University employers would be begging us to work for them, which obviously never happened.
There's no easy option. Low paying jobs like McDonald's don't require a degree. It doesn't take a degree to become an entrepreneur. If you don't have any valuable skills this isn't really an option. I don't think drug dealers need a degree either.
>>220 Arts. If you can tolerate the Joollywood, ofc. And if you can produce anything. Les belles lettres require only a calculator with word processor on it. Music can be produced with pirated software and/or quite affordable instruments. One instrument is enough for months, if not years. Painting is trickier, good paints can bite the wallet. Aaand thats it. Other arts require more people and/or way more money an individual can scrub.
>>244 Synchan has died quite a number of times over its history lul. We started out as synchan.org in 2010, then moved to synchan.net, and now have synchan.com. Through a series of my own incompetence and a battle with my old host we lost the *chan software I had been developing for Synchan and picked up Tinyboard ever since synchan.net.
My wholehearted dedication to developing Synchan died around 2013, but from 2013-2015 I occasionally chimed in with some updates and bug fixes either because I wanted to see it return to what it once was fueled by short bursts of delusion or I was too stubborn to see it die forever.
Recently the site routed to another project I had been working on, because I forgot to change the port in the apache configuration for synchan.com.
>What do I do in the threads? Talk to people, make conversation. Don't try to get into anyone's pants. It is a social thread on /soc/, for actually being social, without nudity!
>Wait, is this some super-secret cool kids' club where you can only be some sort of shut-in freak to participate in? No, we are moderately tolerant of normalfags here. Feel free to participate, just don't be a dick.
>I DON'T LIKE ___ Discuss it with us, but civilly. If you are spouting out obscenities and insults because you don't like something, chances are, it is not going to change and you will be blown off as some anally pained droll. Now, if you are civil, people will work with you.
Discuss the board and how to improve it, make suggestions, and test posts here.
Share your banners (must be 200 KB or under), icons, flags, and ideas, and/or request them in here. --------------------------- Questions & Answers:
Q: Are you Pantsuwotaberu, the Board Owner of 8/r9k/? A: No, my name is Sentennial.
Q: Do I still have to be 19 to post here like on 8/r9k/? A: No. In fact I think that was the stupidest decision Pantsuwotaberu has ever made. There is no age requirement here; however some people might find people under 18 to be annoying and have a lack of understanding of imageboard etiquette. If this is your first time here you should lurk around to see how others are posting, try to get a feel for it, and then emulate it. Don't be afraid to ask for help, that's what we're here for. REMEMBER: Nobody here knows who you are, you are safe. --------------------------- UPDATES:
-Added flags (see pic related) -Changed name of handicapped flag from "Invalid" to "Cripple", and also changed the icon to a higher resolution
>>187 That r9k is probably dead, so this is the next best thing. Also is it true, did Pantsuwotaberu go full drunk and hotpockets one night? If so, it's sad how cuckolded Datamining Cripple Kike-chan's residents have become. Like they do know they can open up a new board right?
Hell our /am/ got possesed by a rule faggot, so we made /AM/. Sure enough after enough people left old /am/ the rule faggot mod plus his ilk left old /am/. Now we have /am/ as our playground and /AM/ as our new home/stomping ground.
I really haven't had much to add to this board, but I've really enjoyed it and used it quite a bit. I haven't been posting here but there's been a lot of useful info on this board that I've managed to use. I'd just like to put this down somewhere so that the people running it know that its good work you're doing.
>>201 I thought not bad, but just now the news said some school made into policy that you can only call girls and boys "students". So who knows. But, it may not be as bad as it sounds because of the way Finland handles policy: we like to write things down in a strict way but rely on good judgement in practice. It's not worrisome because it's not state law, just a policy markup, and because of a cultural atmosphere that you wouldn't understand. But the text exists, so I guess it's a precedent.
>is it possible to get a job over there no >without learning Finngolian comme si, comme sa >I do in fact have a STEM degree nnope.
But I'm fucking with you, both high end and low end jobs exist, and it's scarce at the middle. It all depends what exact degree you have and feel lucky about in such a small national economy as ours.
Come treat our elderly, please, so I don't have to. You're paid in welfare rudabagas.
Honestly, it's likely to be able to come to Finland on a STEM degree, but whoever sends you through Uni connections or something knows the insider shit better than I ever would. Ask around.
>>116 The dream is easily attainable you shitstain, it's not some asinine shit like becoming a Pop Star, or an artist. It's not my fault you can't study a worth while degree because you have a limited set of interests and aspirations.
>>115 Chem major here. With your undergrad, you can secure yourself a nice $35k/year start as a line chemist making drugs for the biggest drug dealers ever. If you get a master's degree, they'll probably even give you a raise...
But you'll always be making drugs for somebody. Hindsight, Breaking Bad isn't such a bad direction to go.
My red eared slider's aquarium has become a breeding ground for fucking fruit flies. Sadly I can't clean his tank as often as I'd like since I'm a Uni student, so I clean it once every sunday. Is there something I can spray to prevent future infestations, or should I just give him away just in case?
07:17 -!- Irssi: Join to #darkplaces was synced in 1 secs
07:19 < unixuser> Xonotic stand alone mod: https://lgdb.org/game/chaosesque-anthology 07:19 < unixuser> Has reached release 93. Over 100 weapons, city generation, buildable buildings (like RTS) and
furnishings, spell casting, medeval weaps, futuristic weaps, modern weaps, foliage system,
nukes, etc etc. Thoughts?
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07:22 < Diablo-D3> dunno why'd you make a xonotic mod
07:29 -!- Lava_Croft [~LC@126.96.36.199] has joined #darkplaces
07:37 < Space_Man> thanks mikee
07:38 < Diablo-D3> sigh is that mikee? =/
07:41 < unixuser> Diablo-D3: maybe because divverent coded the base features that were needed for the mod into
xonotic at the beginning of the mod?
07:41 < Diablo-D3> yeah but like, why not just make your own game?
07:41 < unixuser> the rest of the mod is a simple extention
07:42 < unixuser> I don't know, maybe because I was working on things for nexuiz/etc for 10 years...
07:42 < unixuser> (since 2006 atleast)
07:42 < unixuser> maybe I go with what I know...
>Read about Social Anxiety Disorder >Describes me almost exactly
>significant amount of fear in one or more social situations causing considerable distress and impaired ability to function in at least some parts of daily life. >Blushing >Sweating >Trembling >Messed up speech >https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_anxiety_disorder
>>85 go into therapy damnit! I knew someone who stayed a social cripple untill he was 26, because he even was too afraid to meed a therapist. I know this is anecdotal evidence but i bet 90% of social anxiety victims just never gone to therapy and this board wouldnt even exist if they did